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Good Luck.

i’ve never had so much fun as i do when i spend time with my nephew its the most amazing feeling dont get me wrong there are times when he can surely be annoying as any kid can but often he’s just so taken by life and every new thing in it i delight telling him things i love the eager anticipation in his eyes and the vibrancy of his smile hes so excitable and fun loving and so amazingly simple do we get more complicated as life goes on or does life?  If it’s the simple things that make you smile, then what makes you frown? I’m so cynical, I didn’t know what cynical meant a year ago.  I remember a long time ago when Manic and I were in high school and we were listening to idioteque by radiohead and I asked him if he could figure out the lyrics and what we ultimately came up with wasn’t really close to the real lyrics at all…which are really weird “Who’s in a bunker? I have seen too much You haven’t seen enough You haven’t seen it I’ll laugh until my head comes off Women and children first And children first And children” Blah blah it’s incredibly random yet amazing music, shame I haven’t listened to any radiohead since kid a.  I don’t even remember the last time i saw her, isn’t that sad.  What’s even sadder is that last night I laid in bed and listened to nearly every song on my ipod and I actually cried, that takes the asademy award. Only in Dreams is still my favorite song.  I remember once I told my Mom that if I ever joined a band I’d probably play songs like that, she thought it was stupid.  I love the song scarlet begonias by sublime but only for the opening 15 seconds and the part where he raps about smoking pcp cuz it sounds cool.  Think about every song you’ve ever forgotten about, there’s like a million.  Think about every person you’ve forgotten about and every memory.  Is a memory still a memory if you’ve forgotten it? It’s a good thing we’re capable of forgetting things, remembering everything would really suck.  There’d be too much to think about, I feel bad for those “gifted” people who can remember everything.  They should get disbility or something, everyone should pat them on the back when they see them and say “its gonna be alright.”  I’m seeing this girl and she just might be out of her mind.  My brother says it’s not a matter of whether or not the girl you’re with is crazy but a matter of how much crazy you can handle, I think he’s right.  I guess we all go a little crazy sometimes.  That’s a line from scream, which was awesome until you saw it again and realized it sucked.  It’s rare to find a movie thats scary the second time around.  If you wanna be scared go rent event horizon, most underrated thriller ever.  I take that back, thriller by mike blackson is the most underrated thriller ever.  Even though its huge its still underappreciated.  That song should be a hypnotist song seriously because everytime it comes on I lose control of my thought train and body.  Then there’s the video which makes everyone who’s not lame try to dance like a retarded zombie.  Remember when you turned sixteen? Well thats great cuz I don’t.  I like the prodigy.  Aside from being pretty much the coolest word ever and teaching me how to breathe under pressure(youbreatheitin!) I used to listen to this one song called climbatize and had this video in my head that I was going to make for it.  It was about humanity and technology and how our obsession with technology will inevitably be our downfall until we develop a way to coexist with it which we do and the theme of the video was basically “life goes on.”  I’m pretty sure someone else said that too before.  Plus they have a song called smack my bitch up and the video for it is kind of lame but i heard there was tits in it.  Something like four years ago I wrote a post on my lj called reminiscent ramblings which has served as the inspiration for this post.  Initially I was going to write this and take out all of the spaces so that it would in fact be ‘a solid block of text’ but now this is fairly long and I really don’t feel like doing that anymore.  How the hell did we wind up like this?  It’s not as bad as it seems.  I’d like to go on a magic carpet ride someday, what I can’t decide is whether or not I’d want someone else there with me to ruin it.  Where would you go if you had a magic carpet for the night, I think I’d go to japan and I can’t really explain why but I would definitely be listening to steppenwolf.  God complexes.  I hate it when my mom says she believes in god because of how amazing kids are.  She got into this speech today about how god exists because having and raising kids is so hard but parents do it because they love their kids so much.  And only god could have come up with a plan that amazing….well what about all the parents who abandon their kids or kill them or rape them or vice versa, were they part of the plan?  I didn’t say that, but I could’ve.  There wouldn’t have been a point because she believes so blindly nothing short of god appearing before her and saying it wasn’t really his plan in the first place.  Thats the problem with belief systems, they’re often so rigidly unchangeable, Chris Rock really nailed it when he said it’s better to have a few good ideas.  Let’s go for a sunday drive sometime, oh wait gas makes that expensive I guess your fat ass is walking.  There’s really no problem with being fat, until you have to move quickly.  Remember what things were like when we were kids?  We will never be the same.  Pictures are overrated.  Not really, I’m just bitter cuz I lost all mine.  I was driving my nephew to the grocery store today and he started nodding off, so I yelled to wake him up.  He smiled laughed and said “but I’m tired!”  Cutest thing ever #4564332.  You’re a hypocrite, so am I.  Everyone lies. Everyone.  New borns are cute, even when they’re crying you can stare at them and say awww so cute.  It’s even cuter when you turn your hearing off.  I’ve been listening extra carefully to everything and asking Manic what everything sounds like to him, I have a reason but it’s my secret and I’m not telling anyone.  Except the people I’ve told of course.  The only way three people can keep a secret is if two of them are dead, truth.  The chaos theory says….wait, what?  Oh, once I was playing this game with my family and the question was “What would the name of your autobiography be?”, mine was “What?” it seemed fitting.  I’d probably change it to something like “Don’t read this evar,” you know so more people would read it.  Who can decide what they dream, and dream I surely do.  I’d like to go to a 70s era disco club with a bunch of my gay friends, that would be more fun than anyone ever had.  Lovey dovey stuff, sometimes you just can’t get enough.  I’d like to play flashlight tag in a large warehouse, where all the sounds bounced and echoed so that even when you made noise you could never tell where it was coming from.  This one time I was playing flashlight tag and we spent like an hour looking for this one kid and when we finally gave up and went home he was already there.  Look at yourself, you’re stumbling around in circles. Losers and users don’t need accusers.  Is what you’re doing right now going to matter in ten years?  If you answered no then keep doing it.  If you answered yes you might want to stop and ask yourself whether you’re spontaneous enough.  Sticks and stones might break my bones but words will always hurt the most.  They don’t always tell it like it is when you’re a kid, do your kid a favor and give it to them straight.  Just make sure they believe in magic, it is real after all.  I’m not sure whether anyone will read this entire thing, if you just did, I’d be impressed.  Only a little bit though.

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4 Responses to “ASolidBlockofText”

  1. intense neil. real intense.

  2. I respect most songwriters. I tried to write songs when I was younger, but it’s just impossible. Especially those creative ones that make absolutely no sense but still seem meaningful.

    If I could go on a carpet ride, it’d be to Israel. I’m afraid it’s going to go into war, I mean it’s been in war forever, but I want to see all the historical places, hear all the stories from the last 4,000 years before it all disappears. That’d be a magical ride.

    If I had an autobiography my title would “A Human Siberian Tiger”. LOL! Mainly because I’m hoping to finish my life as a strong tiger who fights for what she wants and protects her family. At this point, I’m a baby kitten. 🙂

  3. If I had a magic carpet…I would take it to Buenos Aires, Valparaiso to be exact. When I got there I would trade in the carpet for a KTM Enduro bike and race the Dakar Rally which has moved from Africa to South America this year. No need for a magic carpet when you can make magic on two wheels riding dirty. Holla-atchaboi.

  4. it took me a super long time…. but i read it 🙂

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